in your arms
are security without peace
love without trust
an extraordinary life
in a gilded cage
I could never say yes
still, somehow held on
to the idea that it could change
I could be myself
pressing coffee in the morning
to your sweet smile
rather than watching your regimen
of medications
and moody judgment
I couldn’t hold us both up
forever
I could never say yes
to living in that kind of bondage
tied to your self-pity and power
as I struggled to tread lightly
remain unbruised
unnoticed
your chain of indifference around my wrists, my neck
except when I could turn your disposition
to something that more resembled
the extraordinary life
that held us together
the vision of something better
that we could never attain
